It’s no secret that for the last 284 days I have been
feeling quite low. There have been ups
and downs, but since the day R was born I have generally felt odd... as if I
switched off during the traumatic part of his delivery and never fully switched
on.
Today is the first
time that my emotions have felt balanced.
Today I have been relaxed and HAPPY. Truly happy, as if light was shining out of my
eyes! With an emotional burden lifted, I
feel physically lighter.
But why, I wonder? Since
C + H’s not-so-great birthday, I have tried to ensure they had a relaxed few
days, and it has soothed us all. Baby
and I slept in for a couple of hours longer than usual today too, while Tom made
breakfast for the boys. I don’t quite
believe that some chill out time and some extra sleep could have been the
answer to 40 weeks of confused sadness, but perhaps it tipped the scales? I wonder if I will flow backwards and
forwards a little more until I truly regain my balance in life.
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